I have a confession: I read my horoscope Every. Single. Day. It’s a impulse which I cannot deny myself of. I check a couple of different sites, with a religious furvor to rival that of the Pope and praying, as some definitely seem to give me more to infer off of than others. I read Yahoo! Astrology and Jonathan Cainer’s Zodiac Forecasts, mostly, as they seem to maintain the highest level of acceptability. They usually at least have some interesting relation to my life. I suppose part of my obsession with reading these supposed visualizations of the future which are dreamed up by a buncha people who gaze at the stars all day is that I always hope that they’re going to give me some insight into what is going to happen next. Living for tomorrow is much, much easier than living for today, at least tomorrow gives me something to look forward to. Also, cause seriously, I can’t stand waiting. And by that I mean, I can handle waiting in a line, or waiting for a cake to bake, but when it comes to the long term aspect of my life and what may or may not happen and with whom: I hate waiting with a passion. I loathe it, in fact. Patience never was a virtue of mine. I would rather do keg-stands until my head explodes than wait for whoever it is that I’m supposed to be finding. I’d rather forego shaving only my right leg for a year than “wait to see how things pan out.” I’d rather hurl myself from a moving vehicle into the path of an oncoming train only to survive, but with no arms or legs, than to have to live with indefinite uncertainty. Anything that I can infer out of my horoscope is looked at as divine intervention. I figure someone up there is telling me this stuff in an attempt to help me control my fate. And control is another one of those things that I can’t get enough of. No wonder I’m single. *smile*
I do have to admit that some days there are particular zodiac forecasts that seem so ridiculously far off, I might as well be an Aries, but then there are other days where they are so dead on, I get goosebumps. The ones that are the creepiest are when I read my horoscope at the end of the day, once all the shit has hit the fan and all of the bitch slappin’ has been dealt, and it warns me about the fights and tells me how they ended. Those are the days where it’s a literary kick to the head/ass/sensitive body part. Take today for example:
“No one else is affecting your life but you. Do not give other people the power.”
*BANG!* *CRASH!* *ZAP!* Shit. Where were you 2 years ago?! Believe me, this is a HARD lesson to wrap your head around, but oh-so-relevant! And as I’ve recently found out, ONCE AGAIN, I still have a lot to learn. Guess I’m going to keep on keepin’-on, reading my horoscopes, and waiting for a day to come when I’m less concerned with the “what-could-be” and more with the “what-is”…but don’t expect me to be happy about it.